Loreto OURAN Kirribilli

If Loreto Kirribilli was Loreto Ouran Kirribilli, a much richer prestigious school for millionaire heiresses with too much time on their hands, then some things would have turned out rather differently. Such as when the fire alarm ran.

Beeeep.

Beeeep.

Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeppp.

All the rich girls would be excited, and not as annoyed that something interrupted their very important and educational maths lessons.

“Oh my Goshh! The school’s gonna burn down!!”

“I know!”

The girls all squealed in excitement as the teachers tried to usher them into the school submarines for safety. Yes, school submarine. They’re all so filthy rich they could afford a submarine in case of fires and also because of the daily kidnapping events that are stopped by the high-tech laser-beam gate. So instead of walking annoyedly down a few streets from the school where there was a dead baby possum, the girls strolled down to the school’s private beach in their blue silk uniforms, full of frilly lace and princessy looking things.

“Oww! Your diamond rosary is blinding my eye!!”

“So? You just stepped on my foot with your friggin heavy golden boot!”

“It’s your fault for buying silver boots instead!”

As most girls just left on their private yatchs, and jets, those who didn’t have enough money and parachuted there way to school gave them an evil look before climbing into the Yellow submarine. There was a lil’ problem though, the Yellow submarine, was really built of gold…

...Well sayonara rather unfortunate students and teachers, see you in the next life~

In the mean time a very happy thief had a field day, he was of course the one who set off the fire alarm. He had skilfully dodged the laser beams, avoided the rabid monkeys zoo, jumped the moat full of crocodiles and narrowly missed the giant frying pan a chef accidentally left on the floor which caused him to burn a hole in his pants.

And all he had to do was just light a match and let some smoke get into the alarm, then as everyone left in panic, or rather in joyful enthusiasm, he took his time to decide what he would steal first. The thin sheets of crystal windows? The gold desks and chairs which were cushioned with silk pillows? The diamond toilet seat? - he vaguely thought how much it would hurt to sit on one. Or perhaps the money tree which was shedding hundred dollar notes all over the sapphire bricks of the school playground.

After much debate to himself he decided that he would leave stealing the diamond toilet seat last, I mean who would want a diamond toilet seat?? Each time you sat on it, you were bound not to be able to walk or sit properly for a month.

The next day when the girls who didn’t board the yellow submarine came to school, they wondered why the fire only took away the more expensive things in their school.

“Ohh well, whatever, lets just get new toilet seats, this time do you want to have some gold ones?”

“Yeah whatever, the diamonds one were pretty, but sure, let’s have something new this time.”